I can still do it, can’t I?

I’ve always been a writer.  From the time I was old enough to know how to spell, I’ve had a story in my head clamored to be told.  From the stories I wrote about the members of New Kids on the Block when I was 10-years-old (*facepalm*) until this very moment, I’ve never loved doing anything as much as I do writing.  The problem, though, is that life is currently trying to pound me into the pavement.  When I started writing heavily again 2.5 years ago, it was because I needed an escape from the ugly parts of life that were bearing down on me.  For the longest time, escaping into the lives of the characters I wrote about was quite a healing balm.  Now, though, the dark part of my life that seems to be trying to surround me like a net and suck me under is just too strong.  It pushes away my concentration, my drive, and my very need to write.  It forces me to surf Netflix for an hour trying to find something to watch (and escape into) before I inevitably decide that Netflix is useless (as usual.)  It pushes me to watch stupid videos on YouTube because they take my mind off that unanswered email or that text message that I’ve put off until later because I simply can’t deal.  I guess the whole reason I’m rambling on this new blog is because I need to find my way back to words.  I have two very vivid novels inside my head and I know that I have the talent to make them happen.  I just don’t know how to dig down deep, past all the darkness and misery that is clawing at my heart, and find the words again.  I have to try, though, right?


6 thoughts on “I can still do it, can’t I?

  1. I don’t know if you’ve had the chance to look at my entry today – but it’s like I always tell you in some form, you’re writing every day. Whether it’s our T/R/P stuff, an email, fanfic, or just random things in a notebook. You ARE a writer, because you feel a connection with words. I believe that you can make it happen, Rachel. Not just because you’re my best friend, but because you’re too talented not too. The words are there, once you get them out the dark stuff will fade away like a shadow you can’t even remember. (I was trying to be poetic, did it work?)

  2. We’ve all been there. Don’t be too hard on yourself. Maybe you don’t need to write TODAY. And, if you can just enjoy the NON-WRITING of it all, maybe tomorrow or the day after, you’ll feel revved up to write again…. be kind to yourself. When I’m nice to myself, these non-writing moments, tend to pass on by much quicker. Good luck!

    • You caught me – I’m definitely too hard on myself. I get frustrated if I don’t write something but sometimes, the words just aren’t there! (I knew they wouldn’t be there tonight so I haven’t even tried.) And being nice to myself sounds like a good idea. Hot tea, a warm blanket, and my Kindle? I think so!

  3. It’s so hard when if feels like you just can’t get the words out. I’ve been there. Sometimes the darkness fuels writing like never before. The only answer seems to be the “put your butt in the chair and just write” thing. It seems impossible sometimes but you just have to write something on a regular basis. Doesn’t matter if it’s crap or gold. As long as the words are coming out. Doesn’t even matter if it’s 10 words or a 1000.

    Some of the things that have helped me through my stuck times:

    OneWord.com: They give a one word prompt and you write anything that comes to mind for 1 minute. It’s a great way to get you back into writing. Plus, some of those raw, short stories turn into something more.

    750Words.com: I love to do my Morning Pages (from Julia Cameron’s The Artists Way) here. I also love to work out some of my scenes here too.

    Story Engineering: Larry Brooks’ book on writing structure. It seriously saved my writing life. I was a complete write-by-the-seat-of-my-pants kinda gal. That worked fine for short stories but not so well for my novel. Learning how to outline in a way that didn’t crush my creative flow got me out of a big stuck spot.

    Working on notes, research, etc for a story: When I’m having trouble writing actual scenes for my novel, I’ll working character profiles, research or story bible stuff. Often, it jars something loose pretty quick.

    Hang in there! If you want to write, you will. Just be patient with yourself but firm at the same time. In the end, the only cure for writer’s block is writing.

    • Wow, what great tips! I’m definitely going to check out what you’ve recommended. I think anything that gets my mind in a better place will help me! And I’m like you, when I can’t write, I plan. Plan for scenes, character development, jotting down notes for the scenes I see in my head (that’s usually how I pass my work day.) And you made a good point – letting the darkness fuel my writing isn’t actually a bad thing. Again, thanks!

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